(no subject)

[the_chappy]

Depending on one's point of view, it's either very late or very early when Ryan returns to the flat. He stayed with Chris at the infirmary for a couple hours while Jack was being healed. It was a miracle she'd come out with only cuts and bruises, though he knows the most serious injuries weren't physical.

He had told her she could have a place to stay here but she chose to stay behind in the infirmary. He didn't like the idea, she needed rest not to be fussing over Jack, but he didn't argue with her either. At least she wouldn't be alone.

As quietly as he can, he opens the door, hoping not to disturb David and Elaine.

Comments

[maid-of-astolat.livejournal.com]

Elaine had come back to the flat shortly after both teams had left, not wanting to leave David alone in the apartment, even if he was sleeping. She had also been too nervous to sit still, and knew it would just make Ryan more anxious, watching her pace.

When she'd gotten back to the apartment, she'd gone to their room to pray. She didn't know how much good it would do, but it was something and she couldn't do that in the bar.

When she heard the front door click open, she hurried out to meet Ryan. "Has everyone come back?" she asked anxiously.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_chappy_/]

Ryan's silent at first, surprised and at a loss for words. He'd though he'd have a few more hours before he had to tell Elaine. Finally, he says, "We should sit down."

[maid-of-astolat.livejournal.com]

Elaine looks up at him and then nods, taking his hand and leading him over to the sofa. She can tell just by looking at him that things didn't go entirely as planned.

"What happened?" she asked softly.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_chappy_/]

He sits down across from her, still holding her hand. "Chris is fine. She had very few injuries. Jack and Chase were worse off but they're going to be ok, they're in the infirmary right now."

A small sigh escapes his lips. "Tony didn't make it. He was killed almost immediately after they were captured."

[maid-of-astolat.livejournal.com]

There was a noticable lightening of the tension in Elaine's shoulders when she heard that Chris, Jack and Chase were all right.

But then Elaine pales at the news about Tony and puts her hands to her face, tears coming to her eyes. "Tony, oh God...is Michelle here? Does she know?"

[http://users.livejournal.com/_chappy_/]

He moves closer, wrapping an arm around her and placing a kiss to her temple.

"No, she's not." Whether that's a good thing or a bad thing, Ryan's not sure. "I don't know if she knows."

[maid-of-astolat.livejournal.com]

Elaine just couldn't believe Tony was gone. "They were going to be so happy," she said softly.

She couldn't believe it, she still remembered their wedding, she remembered how happy they both were, Michelle's incandescent smile when she talked about him, the way Tony's eyes got soft when he talked about her...

Elaine shakes her head and pushes tears from her face. She doesn't know how to feel, because it's so sudden. "But Chris...she's all right?"

[http://users.livejournal.com/_chappy_/]

"I know." Several months ago, when he had last spoken to them, they had just closed on a house and were getting ready for the move. They hadn't even been remarried that long.

Ryan sighs, his voice strained when he speaks, "Yeah, she's all right." A muscle in his jaw moves when he clenches his teeth. "A few bruises and burns. Minor." Which made a difference but not a big one. "She was conscious and able to walk. Better than the others."

[maid-of-astolat.livejournal.com]

Elaine's mouth contorts a little as if she's going to start crying, and she pulls her feet up under her and snuggles close to him. "Is she in the infirmary? And...the others...they got healed, didn't they?"

Her voice is shaking a little.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_chappy_/]

"Yeah, they did," he says, rubbing small circles on her back. "Chase and Jack were sleeping when I was up there. Everyone else was fine, none of them were hurt."

A brief pause. "They brought his body back."

[maid-of-astolat.livejournal.com]

Elaine bites her lip and nods. She feels a little incoherent. "How...he has to...a funeral. Tony's Catholic," Elaine murmurs.

Then she closes her eyes and hides her face in Ryan's shirt, and her shoulders begin to shake.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_chappy_/]

"He will," Ryan promises, hugging her close. The funeral would be outside the bar but they could still have a memorial here, Tony had many friends in the bar who'd want to say goodbye.

[maid-of-astolat.livejournal.com]

"I...just wish I knew if Michelle were...if she has people to help her, or if she knew..."

It's awful that she can't do anything, can't hug or comfort or even bring flowers.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_chappy_/]

It was worrying too. If she were here, she'd have people around to take care of her. He's not sure if Michelle has anyone like that and now is not the time for her to be alone.

"Chloe's still outside. Maybe she's gotten in touch with Michelle."

[maid-of-astolat.livejournal.com]

Elaine nods her head and says, "I hope so."

She lifts her head to look at him, sniffling a little. "If Chris needs to stay here, I can ask Bar to put another room on the flat temporarily."

[http://users.livejournal.com/_chappy_/]

"That's a good idea." He smoothes her hair back, his thumb brushing against her tear-stained cheek.

"I asked her if she wanted to stay here tonight but she insisted on staying at the infirmary," Ryan adds, some annoyance in his voice.

[maid-of-astolat.livejournal.com]

Elaine nodded. "She'll have to rest sometime," she murmurs.

She leans forward and kisses his cheek, staying very close to him, remembering all too well how it was to have Ryan out of the bar and imagining how Michelle was feeling.

"How are you?" she asks in concern.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_chappy_/]

"Tried telling her that," he says with a sigh. He kisses her back, grateful for every little touch.

"I'm fine. Tired. Not sleepy though." Ryan tilts his head, looking at her. "How are you? Were you awake when I came in?"

[maid-of-astolat.livejournal.com]

"Yes, I was still awake. There was no way I was sleeping. At least David didn't wake. He knows something's going on but not precisely what."

Elaine sighs. "I'm so glad you're here." Solid, warm, here. Glad she's not sleeping alone tonight and hating herself just a little for being glad in the face of someone else's sorrow.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_chappy_/]

He gives a thin smile at that and rests his forehead against hers for a moment.

"I know I haven't been easy to live with these past few days..."

[maid-of-astolat.livejournal.com]

"You were worried. We both were. I can't fault you for that," she says soothingly.

"She's safe now."

For a given value of safe.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_chappy_/]

"Still. Thank you for...everything," he says softly with a kiss to her forehead. Sometimes Ryan thinks he would have lost his mind by now if it weren't for Elaine.

Other times he knows would.

"Yeah, she is." Though the old worries had been replaced with new ones.

[maid-of-astolat.livejournal.com]

She smiles slightly and closes her eyes. She sighs softly. "It'll probably take a while before she's...herself again."

She's also worried, as well.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_chappy_/]

If she ever is.

"She won't really talk much about what happened." He's not sure if there was any deeper reason for this or what to make of it.

[maid-of-astolat.livejournal.com]

Elaine thinks about this for a moment. "She might...feel badly. About going without..."

Anything. Everything. Saying goodbye.

Elaine swallows hard and doesn't finish the thought. "...and then getting captured."

[http://users.livejournal.com/_chappy_/]

That leaves him speechless. It was so obvious and God knows he'd been angry with her for that but he'd never said it or anything like it.

Not that his daughter would need words to pick up on how he felt.

"She might," he says hollowly, not meeting Elaine's gaze.

[maid-of-astolat.livejournal.com]

"I know I would," she says softly. She puts her arms around him again.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_chappy_/]

"It's not her fault," he says with a shake of his head. "She can't believe that."

That was too much guilt to carry around for something she couldn't control.

[maid-of-astolat.livejournal.com]

"It's very easy to take on blame, even for something that isn't your fault," she says softly.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_chappy_/]

"Easy to drive yourself crazy that way too," he mutters, wondering how he's going to talk to Chris about this.

[maid-of-astolat.livejournal.com]

Elaine nods. She knows about that very well. Of course, back then, there were some that encouraged her.

"It...will take time."

[http://users.livejournal.com/_chappy_/]

Ryan falls silent again, not able to think of anything more to say even with everything weighing on his mind.

"I think we should try to get some sleep. This is going to be a long week."

[maid-of-astolat.livejournal.com]

Elaine sits up. "Yes, we probably should." She stands up and holds her hand out to him.

Together, they walk towards the bedroom, Elaine keeping him very close with an arm around him.

She hopes he does sleep.